Forget danger, you can't be safe anyways



Punching people in the face brings a smile to my face again. I received a copy of Street Fighter Alpha Anthology a few days back. And the cup of nostalgia overflowed. I'm still a little ticked that Capcom didn't include a version of Alpha with the 15th Anniversary Collection. But with this collection I can see why. I think including just one version of Alpha would have only provided a taste of what the Anthology does. Personally, Alpha 2 is the crowning achievement of the Alpha series, but that's just me. The gem of the collection though, ironically has to be the inclusion of Super Gem Fighter MiniMix. With all the hardcore Alpha Counters and Super Combos, it was great to shift gears and play something a little more light hearted. There is no way you can play this game without cracking a smile, despite spewing a raging torrent of curse words at being beaten by the computer yet again. Not that it happened to me or anything. It was all business when it came down to the serious fighters and all the little techniques I had perfected to score multiple hits on unsuspecting foes came flooding back. Warrior's Dreams is much like Street Fighter II, before they added the turbo, as far as the pacing of the fights. It's slow and deliberate. Timing and strategy is much more important than in later incarnations. Alpha 2 expands on this but adds a little speed and a couple of characters, not to mention the cool secret field stage with all the lightning. Alpha 2 Gold is to the Alpha series as Third Strike is to the Street Fighter III series. It takes everything that is good with Alpha 2 builds upon it to make it smoother and more comfortable to play with a few more characters. Alpha 3 however boast the biggest change in game play. The ability to recover mid-air after receiving a hit speeds up the action, and drastically increases the chances you will be KO'd by the computer recovering after you thinking you've pummeled him sufficiently. Yeah, that happened more than once against Adon. Bastard. The influence of the Marvel VS Capcom games can definitely be felt here. But nothing else in the game can be felt more than the computer-controlled M.Bison's Psycho Crusher. It err... crushes you. But it's pretty sweet when it happens. It's not like the one in Street Fighter II, where you can fireball or dragon punch him out of it. The only option is to block it and hope you have enough health to absorb the punishment it deals. And blocking in the air doesn't work. You'll just get splattered all over the place. Then Bison will do that goofy laugh of his while standing over your burnt out corpse. Muwahaha.

Another swing

I finished a drawing about a week ago and even though I don't feel like it's anything spectacular, I submitted it to the reader art section on Juxtapose. It's the second time I've sent something but the last time I didn't read the guidelines as far as the size of the image and just sent it. That doesn't mean that was the reason it wasn't shown; they may have just thought it was crap. Either way, I submitted the new picture "Salome", which was inspired by Aubrey Beardsley's cover. Really, the only similarities are our medium but that's immaterial. It's not really one of my best pieces, but I like it all the same. I hope someone else does too.

Cheeseburger in Paradise


Now Returning to Wichita:A short story by Sarah.
I've found my new calling; i'm gonna work and live at SeaWorld. Me and Shamu, we were meant to be together. This is me in five years, guys. Jumping in the air with Shamu (insert face). I fed a dolphin and a stingray, and I swam in the ocean for the first time and got salt water up my nose. I bonded with my dad who is an avid Jimmy Buffet fan(we drank too many margaritas). I met Captain Hook!

Albert Attacks, Sarah stays cool

Before she left for her week long family vacation in FLorida, Sarah knew that there was a tropical depression headed that way. Little did she know Albert would arrive. In my concern, I texted her to make sure everything was ok. True story: She replies with "No, the girls have taken all the beds and are trying to make me sleep on the couch." Well if they have time to worry about the sleeping arrangments then I guess I don't need to worry too much.

That's what happens when you leave a man alone

The actual event isn't as entertaining as the way Sarah explained it to her dad but that's OK. For comedic purposes I will use her story. Which begins with her coming home from work and finding me in the living room in front of the TV. I have a couple of knives and am bleeding from my right hand. There is a steady torrent of swear words leaving my mouth and I look like a mad man cursing at the television which is in the off setting. All her dad had to say is "That's what happens when you leave a man alone." The only thing that could have made the story any funnier (or scarier) is if I were only wearing a pair of tighty-whities. Fortunately that wasn't the case.

Now for the back story as to why I was assaulting the TV. First off, it's a TV-VCR combo. Bad news. I had inserted a tape to queue it up for when Sarah got home. As I was doing this it began to make a strange noise and finally after a moment it just shut off. Concerned, I tried to turn the TV back on, which it did, but for some reason the tape appeared to be stuck. After trying to eject the tape the TV once again shut off. It continued to do this after several tries. So I get the bright idea that I can just pry it out. I reach my hands inside and try to pull it out but something inside is holding it tight. In my now understood to be vain struggle to pull it out my hands rubbed against the top of the opening, slicing my skin open. Hence the bleeding. I didn't even feel it until my hand got sticky from the blood. So at this point I'm livid and decide to get a knife to jimmy it free. But this was also in vain as the tape still resides inside the VCR. Fortunately I was able to move it around to where the TV won't switch off but I won't be watching any tapes in it for a while, if ever. It is old though, round abouts of six to seven years and I would like to get a new one. The TV part still works fine though so I can't justify throwing it out just yet. But for the record, there were no tighty-whities involved.

Boom Town


GTA Liberty City Stories comes out tomorrow. You know what that means. Plenty of driving on the sidewalk backwards firing a machine gun and yelling fuck the police. Or maybe that's just the way I play. What's in your wallet?

By the way, X-Men blew. Short of Beast trouncing everyone, despite his permed and pressed hair, it was a disappointment. I don't want to spoil anything but I have to wonder why no one asked where Scott was after what seemed like several days. At least Juggernaught said his now- almost-as-famous-as-"I'm-Rick-James-Bitch"-catchphrase. If you don't know what I'm talking about then you need to go to youtube and look under "Juggernaught bitch". It is now part of pop culture, just like Chappelle's Rick James skit.

Can't wait to see how this train wreck ends

I mean, the story is already so screwed up. I like them and all, but really. Why couldn't they just start at the beginning and when they got to the end, stop. Why all the mixing and matching of characters. Why isn't Mystic and Rouge hot? Why is Magneto a frail and useless old man? Why is Wolverine so tall and without any intensity? The only good casting job they did was with Patrick Steward. He was the obvious choice. I did also think Alan Cummins was good as the Elf (Nightcrawler). Tonight, though, I will finally see the much awaited ending of these average series of movies of a better than average gang of mutants. At least Juggernaught says "I'm the Juggernaught!" Too bad he probably won't yell it every time he enters the room.