Snores-ville and a guilty sensation

It is Christmas eve and I'm at work. I am soooo bored. But I volunteered and it's all overtime. Chi-ching. But I am very bored. And no sooner do I write that, something slides over on the fax machine. Me and my big, letter writing pen. It's probably a Mexico insurance policy. How much do you want to bet? Oh that's right, it's Christmas eve and everyone is broke. But why is it when you go shopping for everyone else, you see a bunch of shit you want to buy yourself. But then you don't want to be a jerk and spend all your money on yourself. Besides, that's what all the after Christmas sales are about. You went shopping, saw piles of stuff you want and can't have but now since it's after Christmas you can forget all the bullshit presents you bought everyone else and really get down to purchasing. All for Silas, all for Silas. What? Stop looking like that. I'm not the only one. Am I? Nah.